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I have been friends with a woman, a person who's overcome numerous hardships, her resilience is commendable. But, she has been constantly taken by surprise by people. Her husband left her, which came as a massive blow. A lot of close acquaintances disappeared then, as they were focused solely on the spouse. It shocked her deeply. She put in increased attention toward our bond, likely realised better the meaning of companionship.

The Pattern of Disappearance

Throughout this period, quite a few close to her vanished leaving her knowing the cause. Her last employer suddenly changed toward her, even though she had been highly competent, her exit happened not understanding why things shifted.

Current Dynamics

Recently, we've both retired and are seeing each other more, yet I realize the part I play in the relationship is as the audience. I start subjects but she shifts conversation onto her own topics. Regarding political views, she holds unyielding views. My effort is to suggest double-checking information and different perspectives.

She's been organizing a trip to a nation I know well on several occasions and lived in for some time. I attempted to share personal experiences, yet it was unappreciated. She really solely sought me to confirm her decisions. I've just come back from 30 days in that place she is eager to catch up, yet I'm reluctant.

Weighing the Options

I don't want to act as a friend who cuts and runs abruptly, yet I doubt she can understand the effect of how she acts on my confidence. Currently, I find myself in avoidance mode. What's the best step?

Ways Forward

It's possible to walk away, however, that approach is not often a smooth outcome we hope for. But confrontation with the goal of working things out requires bravery and willingness on both your parts.

Professional advice indicates applying a practical approach to handling disagreements:

"Step one involves describing what typically happens in your conversations. Aim for this to be based on facts like an unbiased account. The second is to tell her how it affects you emotionally. Ideally, there's no disagreement on this point. What you feel belong to you, naturally. The third step involves requesting how the two of you can shift the dynamics between you."

Remember your friend holds perspectives, thus requiring you to remain ready to acknowledge it. A helpful technique involves stating her:

"It's your turn to speak and I promise to not say anything for 30 minutes."

This can be effective in fostering better communication.

Closing Considerations

She might reject your concerns, as some people hold onto a “survival narrative”: they maintain a narrative about themselves they won't abandon as it feels essential relies on it and it's all they've known. It's tough because there's no thoroughfare in such cases, only cul-de-sacs. Yet she could initially present this way before reflecting your perspective. If a resolution isn't found a fix, it will give you closure that you've been truthful.